sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
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