my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
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It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When did we convert life to cartoon?
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
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