Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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