Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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