I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
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