I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Randomize