remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
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