It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
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