I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
They have beer where we have blood.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Randomize