I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Randomize