Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
Randomize