soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
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