If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heโs Upset Because People Told His Mom
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Oh and itโs been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! ๐๐๐๐ฌ๐ณ๐
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