how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
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