Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
I should be sponsored by Trojan
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize