Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
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In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
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