She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
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she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
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I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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