We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
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When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
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She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
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