walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
Randomize