If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
I think we might need a safe word for this...
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize