Where did you get a picture of my penis
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
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I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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