I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
We named our party play list daddy issues
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
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