Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
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the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
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I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
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