Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
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Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
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