How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Randomize