Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
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