He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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