Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
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