I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
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