yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
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Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
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