Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
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