Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
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I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
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she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
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