I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
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the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
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Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
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