Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Randomize