it wasn't lemon gatorade
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
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