apparently the secret to your success is patron
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
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