Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
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Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
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My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
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