I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
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He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
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You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
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