i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
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Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
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