I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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