So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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