i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
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