already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
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