So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
In America we eat man semen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Randomize