My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
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