Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
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