We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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