Do you still have your period?
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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