these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
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