My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I love black thongs
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if i get the "i'm engaged" text one more time, i'm going to shoot myself in the face so my cats won't eat it when i die alone.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
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